Dearest 2 Skinnee Faithful: I have just recently been made aware of a grave situation involving a deceit perpetrated at the highest levels of corporate America aimed at destroying both my reputation and the reputation of one of the most revered figures in Christian holiday tradition: the Easter Bunny, or "Fuzzy" to his friends. Toward this end, a recent photo of Fuzzy and I taken at a mall appearance in Virginia is being circulated along with accusations of improprieties by Fuzzy in his alleged capacity as leader of a vast all-Bunny crime syndicate based out of Chicago. In addition to charges of racketeering and child endangerment, he has been accused of prematurely hatching some of the easter eggs slated for delivery to the children of the world for the purposes of using the underage chicks in a Malaysian prostitution operation funded by the Yakuza. Perhaps more appalling than that is the suggestion of a link between this alleged syndicate and the 2 Skinnee J's own Cash Bunny Billionaires, whom the report claims were directly involved in the vicious beating of Puxatawney Phil this past Feb. 1st at Buckwild, a Pittsburgh area hotspot noted for it's questionable clientele. Normally I would not respond to ludicrous accusations borne on the wings of hate and jealousy, but I would be remiss if I did not come to defense of my close friends. For the record, both of the Cash Bunny Billionaires were with me on the 4th day of my annual month-long birthday celebration on Skeletor Island when the unfortunate incident with Puxatawney Phil occurred. Still, out of concern for their well-being I have asked them to take a leave of absence from the tour and hired Lowell "The Hammer" Stanley to represent them in their upcoming appearance before a federal grand jury. As for the Easter Bunny, he is a loving father of three dozen and one of the most kind-hearted and honest creatures I have ever had the honor to call my friend and sometime business partner, and I am confident he will be cleared of all charges. Sincerely, A.J. "Stumpy" Johnson The Pinnacle of Earth's Current Evolutionary Process The Band Greetings from the Dismal Swamp. As we write, we are hurtling down the east coast, surrounded by spring flowers and mosquitos, on our way to Wilmington, NC. We have just finished the kick-off week of our Volumizer 2002 Tour where we had great shows in Chicago, Dekalb, Cleveland and Norfolk, and are looking forward to another several months of great shows. We know we've been taking it easy for the last couple years, but we're back with a vengeance -- new album and new songs, to boot. Volumizer Released It is now official. 2 Skinnee J's sophomore masterpiece, Volumizer, is available in fine record stores everywhere. We've even seen it with our very own eyes. If you want to do your part for our "Middle Class in 2002" campaign, you can purchase the album either at stores or at one of our upcoming shows. Each purchase of Volumizer will put about $2 towards our current band debt of approximately $1 million (I wish we were joking about that figure.) The current sales of 2,000 copies of the record have been a blessed relief, but we're looking for just a little more to escape from the record industry's yoke of indentured servitude. Any assistance will be greatly appreciated. So get your asses out there and make Stumpy proud. If you pick it up, write us at skinneej@aol.com and let us know what you think of it.... On a side note, if any of you have any difficulty finding the record, please forward a note to our e-mail address, skinneej@aol.com so that we can show it to our label. Please be as specific as possible about the store name and location. Lack of proper distribution has killed many a rock and roll career, and we don't want to go down without a fight. Grown Up Video on TRL For those of you TRL addicts, an excerpt from the video was shown on Wednesday, March 27, during and interview with Andy Dick, the video's director. Andy Dick also did an interview on Carson Daley's late night show here they showed an excerpt as well. Check your local listings. In any event, the video should hit M2 and possibly MTV next week. We'll keep you posted. Give us a Hand Grown Up is now being played on about 40 radio stations nationwide, but we need help on the phones. Below is a list of stations where the song is already being played. Call them for us and demand to hear Grown Up. WHRL/Albany: (518) 218-1031 WMRQ/Hartford: (860) 666-4444 WJSE/Atlantic City: (609) 927-1027 WRRV/Newburgh: (845) 451-9778 WEEO/Hagerstown: (717) 709-0800 WRAX/Birmingham: (205) 741-1077 WARQ/Columbia: (803) 776-1013 WWVV/Savannah: (800) 343-4569 WXSR/Tallahassee: (850) 386-3101 KXNA/Fayetteville: (501) 582-1049 KQRX/Boise: (915) 520-9500 KPNT/St. Louis: (314) 969-3833 KMBY/Monterey: (877) 657-1343 Q101/Chicago: (312) 591-8300 or at Q101.com email: sludge@q101.com The Zone/Phoenix (602) 260-1015 KZone.com The Wave/Charleston (843)853-WAVE 96wave.com Z101/Roanoke (540) 344-1101 THE RIVER/Omaha (712) 328-6970 95x/Odessa (915)563-9500 95X.NET KPKX 95.7/Bozeman (406) 586-5858 101 ROCKS/Richmond (804) 345-9101 XL102/Richmond (804)345-WRXL 105.7 THE PEAK/Spokane (509)241-1057 1057THEPEAK.COM X104.5/Baton Rouge X1045.COM KLSU 91.1/Baton Rouge (225) 388-5578 WKLQ 94.5/Grand Rapids (616)774 9450 WGRD 97.9/Grand Rapids (616) 770-9473 WGRD.COM 99X/Greenville, NC (252) 636-WXNR WXNR.COM 99X/Ft. Meyers (941) 275-4999 99XWJBX.COM KPOI 97.5/Honolulu (808) 599-5764 The Lick 106.3/Little Rock (501)433-1063 LICK1063.COM 102.3 Extreme/Ft. Wayne (219) 747-7711 EXTREME1023.COM The Planet 96.5/Lafayette (337) 332-3747 PLANET965.COM THE ZONE 94.1/Rochester THEZONE941.COM Planet Radio 93.3/Jacksonville (904) 448-0933 PLANETRADIO933.COM WJJO 94.1/Madison (608) 321-0941 WMAD 92.1/Madison (608) 261-0921 96X/Norfolk/Virginia Beach 757-622-9696 96WROX.COM For those of you in the DC, Atlanta, Denver,New Orleans, New York, Los Angeles and Boston areas, please help get our stuff on the radio!!! Crooks in these cities have taken Stumpy's payola and stiffed him. Unfortunately, his enforcer goons are tied up in the situation in the middle east, so he's relying on your goodwill (assisted by his mind-control techniques). Here are the numbers. Thanks for your help. Atlanta, GA 99X 404-741-0997 99X.COM Boston, MA WBCN 617-536-8000 WBCN.COM Boston, MA WFNX 761-595-1017 WFNX.COM Denver, CO KTCL 303-631-2933 Denver, CO 96.5 The Peak 303-892-0965 THEPEAK.COM New Orleans, LA KKND 504-260-1067 KKND.COM New York, NY KRock 888-923-5762 WXRD923@AOL.COM Los Angeles, CA KROQ 800-520-1067 KROQ.COM Washington DC WHFS 1-800-321-WHFS WHFS.COM Washington DC DC101 1-800-333-2101 DC101.com Upcoming Dates We'll be heading out for most of the spring supporting the release of the record and we look forward to a real tour -- the likes of which we haven't done in over a year. We kicked off in Chicago for a record release party, and are now finishing up our first run in the Southeast. We'll be heading to Louisiana and the Midwest in a few weeks. Check the website for updates, but here's what's planned so far: Fri. 3/29: Radford, VA - Radford University (with Ludacris) Sat. 3/30: Richmond, VA - Canal Club Mon. 4/01: Greenville, SC - The Handlebar Wed. 4/03: Raleigh, NC - Lincoln Theatre Thu. 4/04: Washington D.C. - 9:30 Club Fri. 4/05: Columbia, SC - 3 Rivers Music Festival Sat. 4/06: Charlotte, NC - Tremont Music Hall Sun. 4/07: Charleston, SC - The Music Farm Sat. 4/13: Baltimore, MD - Goucher College Fri. 4/19: Atlanta, GA - Earthlink Sat. 4/20: Asheville, NC - TBA Sun. 4/21: Augusta, GA - TBA Tues. 4/23: Pelham, AL - XFest Wed. 4/24: Tallahassee, FL - TBA Fri. 4/26: Baton Rouge, LA - Varsity Mon. 4/29: Little Rock, AR - TBA Tues. 4/30: Columibia, MO - TBA Wed. 5/1: Omaha, NE - TBA Sat. 5/4: Chicago, IL - Q101 Radio Fest Sun. 5/5: St. Louis - PointFest Sat. 5/11: Rochester, NY - TBA w/ Jurassic 5 We'll be adding new dates as go along, so check the website for updates....or you can check www.pollstar.com and get the dates before we even do!!! Merchandise!!!!! Buy Volumizer, Supermercado or our live bootleg as well as posters and t-shirts directly from Mr. A.J. "Stumpy" Johnson at any of our upcoming shows. www.2SJ.com Check us out on the web. Updated yearly since 1996. Also, give us feedback at skinneej@aol.com if you have any suggestions/complaints about the website. This weeks attachment is a tremendous picture of Stumpy. Those not receiving the attachment with their email may view it at members.aol.com/famousrt - or those not wanting to download it may view it there as well. Contact me anytime at FamousRT@aol.com. 2 Skinnee J's debut album, Supermercado, available nationwide in stores near you. For more information, visit http://members.aol.com/FamousRT/2sj.html Remember, you are All Champions! <---- back